12-02-2013, 05:42 PM
In a Tweet this afternoon, USC's former head football coach Ed Orgeron proclaimed that God built USCs football program.
Well, a few thoughts:
(1) Once again this year, God apparently slept through the UCLA and Stanford games;
(2) In his holy practice of looking after the meek, the Lord chose as the former coach's replacement Steve Sarkisian, the coach who perfected the five-loss season;
(3) Its hard to know why the Lord would have chosen for his team those two colors; ironically, they look like Hell together;
But perhaps there's a good explanation:
(4) The Lord created the program early on the first day, before there was light. In the light, He almost certainly would have noticed all the screw-ups;
(5 This proves conclusively that the Lord does indeed work in strange ways; and
(6) It seems certain that His first words, after surveying his finished product, must have been Let there by losses.
Well, a few thoughts:
(1) Once again this year, God apparently slept through the UCLA and Stanford games;
(2) In his holy practice of looking after the meek, the Lord chose as the former coach's replacement Steve Sarkisian, the coach who perfected the five-loss season;
(3) Its hard to know why the Lord would have chosen for his team those two colors; ironically, they look like Hell together;
But perhaps there's a good explanation:
(4) The Lord created the program early on the first day, before there was light. In the light, He almost certainly would have noticed all the screw-ups;
(5 This proves conclusively that the Lord does indeed work in strange ways; and
(6) It seems certain that His first words, after surveying his finished product, must have been Let there by losses.

